… I’m just gonna cut right to the chase here – I purposely slit my wrists today with a razor and broke my 2 year streak. It’s not even that I was I feeling down or upset – I was at work! And it just felt good… But of course, now I feel guilty and I’m worrying about how to tell my husband.
Why can’t I stop?!
As a Psychology student I’m already aware of the endorphins and the addictive nature of the opioid system – but seriously!
Is it ignorant of me to wish I was a smoker and not a cutter? At least smoking is socially acceptable.
I’m not looking for sympathy. I’m just frustrated and fed up with cutting. “Then why did you do it?” you might ask… Well, why does someone trying to lose weight give in to a binge? Or a smoker trying to quit give in to a smoke? Because it feels good. That’s why. But I’m sick having a habit that I have to hide and that makes people think I’m suicidal or whatnot (which I’m definitely not!).
Am I just weak?